We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
