I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
