perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
