Fine. I'll sleep in my office
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
