I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
this will be a night to untag.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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