I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
