its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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