I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
