Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
