He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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