census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
