Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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