mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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