I think i peed on brittanys purse
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
whose ass print is on the piano?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
