did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize