I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
