YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You need Xanax blowdarts
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize