Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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