I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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