So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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