Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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