What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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