It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
