hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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