Pappa wants mamma naked
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
