i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize