im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
