Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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