So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
