great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
