WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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