you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
