Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
