I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
