Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Just high enough for therapy.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
