I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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