So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
