Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
