My Higher Power is John Stamos
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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