the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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