If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize