I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
