I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
