420 ftw
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
PANTIES FOUND
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize