I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
