I like to think it a success when the cops are called
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
