I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
This is the prime rib incident all over again
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
