is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
