I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
