I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize